Relying on the Lord!

Monday, June 27, 2011

Dear Mom,

Well can I just say that I have been truly relying on the Lord this week and it's been tough. I told President Moldenhauer in my letter to him last week of how I'm kinda doubting myself and wondering if I am really the best trainer for Sister Henson. He sent his last message to me and told me to trust in the Lord and not myself and that the Lord will direct me in this path that I'm going to be going through for the next while. He then said, “God be with you till we meet again!” So I know I'm going to see them after my mission. It is sad that their time is over in three days! I can't believe they have served the Lord for three years. Just think, my time too is going quickly so I will soon feel what they are feeling now. But I still have lots of time right! LOL.

So my first week has been a struggle because I don't have Sister Black anymore to help me and it's been tough in lessons, but I know it's a work in process. I remember the tough time I had when I first came out and that I had to really trust in the Lord to help me to be able to teach. I know over time Sister Henson will be able to do this. I don't know how this transfer is going to play out or what trials or struggles we are going to have, but in the end we are going to learn from it and have us each become a better person in the end. It's been weird just having me and Sister Henson around because I really haven't had anyone to really open up to or to have a really good heart to heart talk. In the beginning I really talked mostly to Sister Black and we would work together on how we could help Sister Henson be strong and to not doubt herself. And since Sister Black has left, it's been super quiet in the house, like we hardly ever talk really unless I'm preparing her for a lesson or helping her feel better. By the end of the week though we have been talking a little bit more which is good, so it's a work in process. I have no idea how long I'm going to be serving with her; there’s a very good chance that we could have another transfer together, but you never know when my time is up in La Porte, Texas. It was funny seeing everyone this week because they thought that I was leaving so that was funny, but it was exciting to still be able to work with the investigators that we have here! I'm excited to work hard this transfer and really get into the work in this area. There is a lot of the Lord's work and I know he is going to help Sister Henson and I work together to find our dear brothers and sisters who are searching for the gospel!

Well Mom, I loved all the pictures that you sent me. I can't believe Zaebyn is walking; I didn't even know that he has been crawling. He is so big and grown up now! He totally looks like Wade in some of his baby pictures. I just hope when I come home that I can spend time with Zaebyn so he can get to know me and not be scared of his Aunt Lou! And with Kadie and Ella, that is super crazy! Just like you said, they really looked alike in that one picture you sent me. If you hadn’t told me who was who, I would not have known. They are getting so big! It's going to be so exciting to see them when I come home because they are so big and I bet they are lots of fun and plus they know me and I know they will give me BIG HUGS when I come home! And with Rylee, oh my goodness, she is getting big too! It's crazy how much kids change and grow up! I can't believe I am an Aunt and my nieces and nephew are just growing up so much. Heck when Rachel and Jackson start having kids, their kids are going to be big too! I just hope I'm not too far off from having kids so that I can have kids with my siblings; I don't want my kids to not have any cousins their age. But hey, we will see what happens when I get home. But I was just so shocked how much everyone has grown up. I bet home and Shelley has changed too! That is just super crazy! Coming home in 8 months will be very interesting, I can tell ya that!

Oh, I wanted to tell you before I forget! So you know Sister Mitchell from the ward here in La Porte, well she is having surgery tomorrow! I won’t go into details about the surgery for the blog but I can tell she is nervous and very scared, so please keep her in your prayers tomorrow! It's going to happen sometime tomorrow morning. Her husband is going to text us and let us know how the surgery went and keep us informed! It's so neat all the support she is receiving from the ward and from her family and friends. They are all praying and fasting for her! So I wanted to let you know so you and anyone else who reads my blog can pray for her as well. I really care for the Mitchell family! They have become part of my life forever and they have been nothing but kind, loving and full of lots of support and love! So please pray for her. I know when I went in for my surgery it was awesome to feel so much comfort and peace even though I was scared but I knew my loved ones and dear family and friends were praying for me, so I would hope she too can feel that peace tomorrow!

So mom, in Relief Society yesterday I saw a church magazine and it had two cool new cd's. One was "The Essential Missionary Collection, Hymns that Uplift and Inspire" and I don't know if that has the church seal or if it's by the Mormon Tabernacle. I want you to check it out for me and also "This Is The Christ". Just see if I could have those cd's. It would be fun to listen to new stuff because the same old music sure gets kind of boring.

So this last week in La Porte has been good. We are trying to find a teaching pool still; we have some days where we think we can teach a certain person that we come in contact with but when we try and try well, they say no thanks or we just never come in contact with them again, so that is hard sometimes. But it's been fun to see the members and a lot of the less actives in this ward. I really think this transfer that we might be getting into some homes that haven't been to church in a while and that is going to be awesome to help them come back to church. I have never really understood the importance of coming to church until I got on my mission. I knew that it was a commandment and that we need to partake of the sacrament, but now I have learned so much about how much church truly helps you for that next week! It refills your spiritual cup that helps you to get through the week ahead! I love going to church! It's so powerful with all the talks and the lessons that you hear and that you learn from!

Do you know what was cool this last Sunday … I was asked to teach Sunday School for the investigators class. The lesson was on Baptism! And oh boy, I learned so much about baptism and how it's important. I knew it was important, but it's like you learn so much more when you study something and your testimony grows so much. I think it was neat to learn more about baptism because who knows when I need to talk to someone about baptism or help prepare them for that special day of baptism. So it was good; I think I could have done better in my lesson but people thought it was good. I had the class involved and I asked questions and had people read stuff, so that was really cool. It was so funny, I was late to class because I was talking to our new member Lauro and when I got to the room I was my happy bubbly self and said, “Okay class, thanks for all who are here. Let’s get our scriptures and our Gospel Principle Book and let’s have a prayer and we will get class started.” It was just a really cool feeling! I was really proud of myself for accomplishing a goal and to not really be so worried and nervous! It was also awesome because I had Sister Gale, who has become a really close dear friend to me in this ward, in my class! Her name is Jerri Gale and she is the BEST!!! She is always willing to drive us to places when she isn't working and she loves to hang out with us. Well Sister Henson told her that I was teaching so Sister Gale came in to give me support. I asked her how she thought the lesson went and she said it was awesome and that I didn't look nervous and that it was great! I thought that was super sweet of her. She told me, Sister Henson, Sister Black and Sister Bouwhis that we need to keep in contact with her when that time comes to leave because she loves us so much. I said I for sure would. She said, “Well that is what all missionaries say and I have only kept in contact with one for a long time.” So I am making a goal for myself that I am going to really stay in contact with the people who have become part of my life. So mom I need you to help me with that and create a new e-mail address for me so I can give it to people so I can have their e-mail address and they can have mine!

Oh mom did I tell you that Sister Black and another Sister got to hang out with us till Wednesday afternoon! Yeah, because Sister Black and this other Sister were waiting for new missionaries to arrive as they are both also now training. So we had four Sisters until Wednesday so that was lots of fun! But it was very sad when that time had to come to say good bye. But it's going to be neat because Sister Black and I have made plans to go to Hawaii on a trip and to even try to go to New York to see the Sacred Grove too! So I'm super excited but I just have to save some money first before she gets home. But yeah!

Well mom I love ya and miss ya lots. So tell me how things are going at home and if there are any new plans happening to our home and what's new in Shelley or just any news. I hope you’re doing well and that you are still going to the Temple every week! I know you will see the blessings of going and it will help you become stronger in the Gospel and twenty times closer to the Lord! I want to tell you something mom; I would like to go to the Temple when I come home off my mission when I get off the plane so I can go to the Idaho Falls Temple as a missionary. I wonder if that is possible and Melanie, Troy and Rachel, Jackson, Wade and Cadi can be there and you and dad. That would be just so cool! I hope we are able to do that and we all can get a picture outside the Temple! That will be so cool! So mom let’s try to plan for that okay!

Well mom I have to run and write to the new Mission President and tell him a little about myself and about what's going on here in La Porte. I love you, I love you lots, and have fun at Girls’ Camp and please tell all the girls I love them very much and I'm so proud of them, and that they are always in my prayers and I think of them always, and have fun with all the bugs. And yeah mom I know what you will go through with camp because over here in Texas, there is nothing but lots of bugs and mosquitoes. I haven't told ya that yet but ya we have to deal with them every day! So I am not feeling sorry for y’all. Lol, just teasing. Just wear lots of bug spray and oh I learned this in Texas … if you eat bananas, the mosquitoes are attracted to ya! Just for you information! Well I love you!

Love Sister Hawkins!

Since I don't have any new pictures to post from Emily this week, I thought I would post the ones of her nieces and nephew she was talking about in her letter.

Kadie and Ella

(Could you tell them apart?!?)

Rylee - 5 months old

Zaebyn - 13 months old

Still in La Porte!

Monday, June 20, 2011

Hey Mom,

Well you’re not going to believe this but guess what!!!!! Guess where I am serving!!!! LA PORTE, TEXAS!!!!! Wow can you believe that? I am still in La Porte! That totally blew my mind when we got the call Saturday night and we were told that all three of us were staying in La Porte. (At least that is what we thought!)

Well on Sunday I was just having a great day knowing that I was going to have Sister Black for six more weeks to help me continue to train Sister Henson. Then the Assistants to the President came by the church to drop off a car and they handed Sister Black the key. She asked them was the key was for. They then said to her, “You don’t know?” They then told her that she was getting transferred and that she will be opening a up new area plus she is training!!!!! Yeah for real! Both her heart dropped and my heart totally dropped like a huge bomb went off. I was just starting to freak out!!! I was like, I can't do this! How can I do this? How am I going to get through this transfer with Sister Henson? She is a sweet girl but she is just not trying and she doesn't talk in lessons and I'm just freaking out at this point. We went to the bathroom because I was crying and I needed a minute to pull myself together. We all went into the bathroom and I just broke down and was very firm with Sister Henson. I told her she needs to step up and that I can't do this work alone. I told her I need a companion who is willing to try and to come out of their shell. I told her I can't teach the lessons by myself and I need her to start talking and be more open. I told her it's not easy and that she really needs to rely on the Lord and that He is going to help her! She told me that she would so I said okay.

Church was starting so we all went into the chapel. During Sacrament Meeting I was just not in a very good mood. I was crying and just so worried and just stressing and wondering how I can do this if I don't have a good connection with my companion and that we hardly talk. I was just upset. Well Sister Black could totally see it so she passed down a sweet note telling me that she loves me and that Sister Henson needs me! That made me cry even more just thinking why me? How can I do this? While the Sacrament was being passed I just prayed in my heart for comfort and for some help! I started to feel some peace and things felt a little better. After church we said good bye to people and then I asked Elder Walker for a blessing. It was a wonderful blessing! I just love how the priesthood is restored on the earth and we can have it in our lives to bless us and to really give us the comfort that we need. It was a really sweet blessing talking about how it's time for me to be a leader and to be humbled and to have patience and to learn how to seek. I was told that the Lord loves me very much. In the blessing Elder Walker said he could always feel the radiant love the Savior has for me and he also said that he sees the comfort the Lord has given to me during the times of stress, frustrations and when I needed the comfort the most. He also said that I'm going to learn. It was a wonderful blessing! Very Powerful!

But I know it's going to be a hard transfer because after church we went visiting and Sister Henson wasn't trying. At one of the less actives home Sister Black ask Sister Henson to talk and to hold a conversation with this member but unfortunately she just sat there and did not talk. My heart just sunk really deep. When we were driving to the next appointment I was kinda frustrated and so I asked Sister Henson, “What happened? You told me today you were going to start trying and you didn't even talk when Sister Black asked you to talk?” She just sat there in the back seat of the car and did not answer me. I then kinda got after her and I told her that it's hard. I told her that I know what she is going through and that I know she feels scared and nervous and that she doesn't know what to do or to say and feels like she can’t do it. But I told her that over time she is going to talk and I will just be there and do my best to help her. She was still quiet but it was different the rest of the night because she started to talk some at the other appointments we had. So I don't know how this is going to work and I'm just praying so hard in my heart that a miracle will happen for me and that when Sister Black leaves on Wednesday that I have that power from God to be able to handle things and that I will be able to control the lessons to make them understandable and not confusing and that I will be able to still do tracting for the Lord! I am also praying for Sister Henson and that she too will see change and learn to love her mission.

I know that these first few paragraphs might seem mean and that everybody is probably thinking, wow she is tough and rude. But I know that Sister Henson has a sweet spirit and that she is special in her own way and that she is going to touch lives and that she is going to become a different person and become more like our Heavenly Father. I know that she is struggling just like I was and I just don't know how trainers get through these tough times trying to teach the new missionaries that things are going to be better down the road and to believe in us and to really rely on the Lord. I know the Lord shows us a lot of weakness up front when we enter into the mission field but He never leaves us alone to face our weaknesses. He is there to make us stronger!!!! I know some how and in some way that the Lord is going to pull me through this and He is going to make me and Sister Henson stronger in the process. There is a cool quote that I found yesterday while looking through the conference Ensign; finding it was a tender mercy from the Lord showing me that He is there for me!

It's by Elder Orson F. Whitney from the Talk by Elder Kent F. Richards entitled “The Atonement Covers All Pain"

"No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as Patience, Faith, Fortitude, and Humility.... It is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire."

Now isn't that just beautiful for us to hear that any trials that we go through we get the education that the Lord wants to give us and it's such a blessings to be able to always learn through our trials and to have them make us stronger. That is why we have those weaknesses in life so that we can learn and grow. We just need to be ready for the trials and stay close to the Lord so He can make us stronger. We need to have faith to get through the trials. And with this trial of training for another six weeks I know it is going to be tough and there are going to be lots of tears shed wondering what I can do for my Sister who is struggling and scared with this new missionary life, but that is why we have the Atonement; to use it and to become stronger and closer to the Lord! Man, isn’t' this just awesome all the things I am learning! Wowsers!!!! :)

Well mom to let ya know, my dear friend Elder Walker got transferred to Pine Trails. That isn't far and he also got released as our District Leader but now he has been called to be a Zone Leader and what is funny!!! … he is my Zone Leader now! LOL. So I still get to see him at meetings. I just thought that was so funny! I joked with him today on the phone when he called us to tell us he is our Zone Leader. I said, “Well Elder Walker, this is preparing you for Assistant to the new Mission President soon!” And he was like "I will cut you!" Ha, Ha It's a joke we had in the District before he left. So it was funny.

Well mom it's pretty crazy that President and Sister Moldenhauer are leaving pretty soon … in like a week and a half! I can't believe that the day is coming where they are going to be gone. Today is going to be my last letter to President Moldenhauer and next week I will be reporting to the new Mission President! Yikes! Weird, I don't know what I'm going to say but the spirit will guide me! I'm praying today to know what to write in my last letter to President Moldenhauer and to also know how to ask him for more guidance on what I can do to help Sister Henson!

So something else interesting right now is that we currently have four Sister Missionaries in the apartment. Sister Black will stay with us until her new companion arrives on Wednesday and then we have Sister Bouwis, who I have done exchanges with before, staying with us also because her companion is leaving to go home and so she is going to be with us till Wednesday also! So we are really crowded in our apartment! I will have to take pictures of how we are all going to sleep! And oh man, it's going to be super crazy … FOUR SISTER getting ready in the morning trying to hurry in a very tiny bathroom so we still have the time to study! Oh my! Talk about a NIGHTMARE!!! So that is going to be fun to write to you next week about if I can remember.

Man, my mission has just been so interesting with all the things that I'm experiencing! Super fun! LOL! But you know, it's me climbing the mountain that I need to climb right now and me finishing the race like President Moldenhauer told me when he first met with me! So it's going to be awesome to cross the finish line and to get to the top of the mountain!

For each transfer we get new planners to help us plan and keep on tract. And so I always decorate mine; I will have to send you pictures of all my planners so far. Well it was ironic the thing I put on my planner this time. I put my favorite quote and a picture of Christ. It's the quote that is on the wall at home with the picture of Christ! "I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it!" I actually decorated my planner before I knew how transfers were going to happen so now looking back I can see the Lord had to direct me to put that on this transfer’s planner, because this isn’t going to be easy but in the end it's going to be so worth it! Amazing uh, how the Lord works in all ways to help us out in our time of need! I'm so grateful for my mission and for the wonderful blessings I am receiving and for the experiences I am having! I just love it! Even though it's tough, it's so worth it because of who I am becoming! :)

Well mom, it's time for me to end my letter and go write President Moldenhauer before my P-day is over! I want to let you know that I love you and thank you for all the wonderful guidance and the knowledge that you and dad have taught me while growing up! It's a blessing of how I have been born of goodly parents like Nephi says in the Book of Mormon! You both are the best!! Well I love you and I will write to you next week to let you know about transfer 8 for me and how the first week went! I'm relying on the Lord and that's how I'm going to get through this! Love You Long Time!!!!

Love Your Daughter,
Sister Hawkins!

Lots of fun pictures today!

Monday, June 13, 2011

Dear Mom,

Well I hope you got all the pictures I sent you; it's been a while since I sent ya pictures! I hope they all went through and got to ya. Well things have been super busy and crazy this last week and I spent most of my time on the computer today sending you pictures so I don't know how much time I will have to write to you today but I will type fast and try to get everything in okay! So here we go ya'll!!!

So mom, you asked me about the book that you made for President and Sister Moldenhauer; well I was able to give it to them last Friday at Zone Conference since it was going to be our last time seeing them before they go home the end of this month. Before I gave it to them I had written in it and then wrapped it up. I walked up to Sister Moldenhauer and said, “I know that we are not supposed to give ya individual gifts but this is from my family and me.” We were in the hallway at church and so she opened it up in front of me. She just loved the book and she was so excited to share it with her family! She said that is was so cool to have a picture of me with them and also my parents testimony! She loved it a whole bunch! So thanks mom for making them one. I also sent you a picture of a mirror that all of us missionaries chipped in to buy them and they just absolutely loved the mirror. I sent a picture of me with the Moldenhauers too and that will be the last one with them until my homecoming. When I was saying good bye they said that they are going to be there! So I'm so excited for that! It will be fun to see them again!

And Mom their homecoming is going to be on July 10th at 10:00 AM. I told her that you’re going to be making that pumpkin cake for them and she is excited because when I at the mission home recovering from my surgery I told her about your famous cake! They are going to have lots of people so I'm excited to see how it goes and she said that she can't wait to see you and dad! So please make sure you can go! It will be awesome for you to go and to hear them talk! They are powerful speakers and they are just so amazing! It's going to be hard to not have them around but I know I will love the new Mission President and his wife too!

Well mom can you believe it's time for transfers already! Wow! I just can't believe it and I sure hope I'm not leaving La Porte; I just love it so much and I love the people I'm teaching and I love the ward and the atmosphere! It's just so wonderful! I have just blossomed in La Porte. There is a nice elderly lady we have been teaching off and on and we got to see her this past week and I told her I might be leaving. She was heart broken but she sure did say wonderful things about me. She told me I have blossomed into a wonderful young lady and that I have really changed ever since I first met her which was in back in January when I got to La Porte. So she has for real seen me change a whole lot and I just love her. I got her information so we can stay in touch and she wishes me well on the rest of my mission. It's been sad telling everybody that I might be leaving because I have been here so long. I have really made a lot of special friendships these last six months. I have just changed so much and I know it's because of La Porte and the ward and my wonderful companions that helped me through the trials that I go through every transfer. It's also amazing to have the Lord be right by my side with everything that I have gone through! I love my Savior so much and He is helping me to become more like Him everyday! It's so cool, my studies are just so amazing and I'm learning so much about the Gospel. I so regret not taking the opportunity to really study growing up and to have not really taken the time to learn of my Savior's love for me and to learn about His teachings. But it's neat that my loving Heavenly Father blessed me with going on a mission and it's been a big life changing experience for me. Mom when I come home I'm going to be changed. I'm not going to be the same. I'm going to be more like my elder Brother and so much more converted to the Gospel! I just can't wait for you to see me and to see how much I have changed! It's super crazy; everyone around me tells me how much I have changed. These last few weeks I have really looked back and pondered on my experiences from the last 10 months and I'm so grateful for all the things that I have been through! It's so cool mom! I'm so grateful to be on a mission and to live and to grow and to change and to find out who I am and what my Savior wants me to be! It's just so cool!!!!!

Well mom my time is short and I got to run. I'm super sorry that my letter is short today; I had to write to President and then send you pictures and also send Rachel a quick e-mail but I love you and I'm grateful for all the things your helping me out with by sending packages and letters … it's the best! I love you and I will let you know as soon as I know about transfers on Monday; we will see where I'm going to be going next. I'll go where ever the Lord wants me to go! But it would be a miracle to stay longer in La Porte but the Lord knows where He needs me to be. Have a great week and I can't wait to hear from you soon. I will write to you next week! I love you so much and enjoy the pictures and thanks for the package! I really appreciate it a whole bunch!!!

Love Sister Hawkins!

Sister Hawkins and Sister Henson

I did some canning with a sister in our ward ... it was fun!

Helping a member move ... gotta love doing service!

We caught a frog one night and we called him

Kronk ... the guy from Emperor's New Groove!

Changing my first flat tire!?!

I am doing it!

Piece a cake ... sort of!

Would not have been so bad if it had not been 90 degrees!

Absolutely LOVED my Hump Day Package!!!

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!

Fruit and chocolate at the Mitchell's house ... Yummy!

This old fashioned phone was at an

investigators house ... and it still works!

More fun sunglasses!

We all made a scrapbook page

for President and Sister Moldenhauer

This was my page!

Special mirror all the missionaries bought for the Moldenhauers!

(Sorry about the glare and reflection!)

My final picture with President and Sister Moldenhauer ...

best "Missionary Parents"ever!!!!

I changed my first flat tire!

Monday, June 6, 2011

Hey Mom,

It for sure has been an interesting week and a very long and stressful week but hey, that is missionary life isn’t it … but you just got to love it! Missionary work is the best thing ever! I love the ward in La Porte and Deer Park! They are truly the best! I'm so grateful for the blessing of the ward helping us with missionary work and being so willing to drive us around and to go out with us and do missionary work! I love Sister Taylor. She is one of the Ward Missionary Leaders and it has been super fun to go out and to work with her! I forgot to tell you last week that she went out with us on Saturday and we were trying a less active lady and then we went back to her car and guess what mom! You’re not going to believe this at all! She had a FLAT TIRE!!! Pretty crazy uh! Well guess what? The Lord blessed me again. I remembered what I had studied in Driver's Ed Class and also all the things I had asked dad about changing a flat tire! So I asked Sister Taylor if she had the tools and an spare tire so I could change her tire. She said, “I do. Do you know how to change a flat tire?” It was funny. Then I said, “I do. I have never done it before, but I have been taught well!” And so I got on my hands and knees and I changed Sister Taylor's Tire! And let me tell you mom, it was super HOT outside and it was awesome because I had sweat dripping off my face! LOL. It showed that I worked hard! LOL. But if I have time today I will send you pictures of me changing a tire! So mom, don't you think it's pretty funny that I have now changed a tire on my mission! I think it is! LOL! I was so excited changing the tire all by myself and the Sisters sat and watched me changed it. I would have taken the time to teach them how to change the tire but we needed to hurry to get back to work for the Lord! So tell dad thank you for answering my questions about a tire change! LOL!

Well mom, my life of being in a threesome has been so interesting because it's kinda hard to get alone sometimes. I must say, its easier sometimes to chill and to share my feelings with Sister Black then it is with Sister Henson, but I know that this is super hard for her right now. It reminds me of my days when I first came out in the mission field. I just know this is super hard for her right now. I'm doing my best to really pray to Heavenly Father and to seek for His guidance right now so I will know how I can help her. I remember when Sister Smith would tell me that she was praying for me to help me get through the beginning stages of my mission and she would pray to see how she could help me out. And so I'm being like Sister Smith a lot in my training of Sister Henson. And it’s tough; I can totally see what Sister Smith had to go through with me. I feel bad for being such a pain sometimes because I know she got frustrated with me because she was trying her best to help me out and all I did was shut down and didn't open up to her for help. Well mom that what is happening to me right now and it's pretty tough. It's hard because I just can't go talk to Sister Black for help because we are in a threesome and its super tough. I'm trying my best to do all that I can for Sister Henson and to be her friend and to help her with her studies and role plays but its hard. There are sometimes that I just want to explode because I know she knows the answer and I just know that it's in her to do these things. But then I always remember my days at the beginning of my mission and how hard and scary it was for me. I know that is what Sister Henson is going through right now. She is just shy and scared and gets nervous really easy but Sister Black and I tell her that it's okay and that we are here for her and we want her to know that over time she is going to get it. And it's so true, just look at me! I'm half way through my mission and I have changed a whole bunch and I'm doing missionary work! It's just so amazing isn’t it mom! WOWSERS!!!!! But no worries; I'm totally relying on the Lord and things are going to be okay. It is just challenges that I have to go through right now to make me a stronger person and to rely on the Lord a whole bunch!

Well mom this last week was “New Missionary Training!” I know I told you that I had to do that when I was new out in the field. Well it was pretty weird to go and experience the New Missionary Training again but this time being the Trainer! It was so nice this time to really relax and to enjoy the talks and to not really worry if they were going to do role playing or ask me to get up to say something. Now it's a piece of cake if they call me up there to say something. I'm still going to be nervous for sure; it's scary to still get up and try to figure out what to say but it's awesome to know that the Spirit really does all the talking and guides me to what to say! LOL. But no worries, I didn't get called up to say or do anything. But it was nice and it was cool because Sister Moldenhauer gave a little talk about my favorite Scripture … Ether 12:27! I totally know that you know that scripture very well! Yes, she said that through our weaknesses we become stronger and we become closer to our Heavenly Father. And it's so true because I look back and I've seen a lot of my weaknesses that I had to overcome and I look at what I went through and how it totally made me stronger! And Sister Moldenhauer told the new missionaries that they were going to be shown many of their weaknesses that they have not seen before placed in front of them, but if they rely on the Lord they are going to make it and totally become stronger! And it's TRUE!! : ) The whole meeting was good and I learned so many things that I need to work on and do better and things I can do to help Sister Henson out too which was a blessing. But it was sad because Sister Henson was having a hard day and got emotional so Sister Black and I took her to the hallway to talk to her. Then sweet Sister Moldenhauer came and talked to her and helped her out. Later when I talked to Sister Moldenhauer she told me that things are going to be okay and that Sister Black and I need to continue to push Sister Henson and to just love her and so that is what we are doing right now. I also had a moment with President Moldenhauer and I asked him what I can do to help Sister Henson and he said, “Do you remember your days at the beginning of your mission? Just do what your trainer did for you. Look at yourself now. You are blossoming into a beautiful rose and still blooming and you have come so far, and what better person for Sister Henson to be with right now then you.” That was really cool what President told me! It made me happy and just reminded me of how far I've come in the last few months!

Well mom it's a truly been a blessing this transfer to see all the wonderful things I've gone through and to really see just how much I've changed and to really be close to my Heavenly Father. My relationship with the Lord has grown so much these last few months and my prayers have really been so sincere and been honest and I am really talking to my Loving Heavenly Father! I'm so grateful for my mission and for this blessing that the Lord has given to me! It's so awesome! I do have challenges but I can make it through them with the Lord!

So mom, my time has run short for e-mailing because I went shopping with Sister Gale today to get me some new shirts and so not much time to e-mail. But I got cute shirts that I will send pictures of. They are super cute! I hope that was okay for me to spend money! Well I love you mom and things are going good and I just love hearing from you and you’re the best mom ever! Well tell everyone Hi and that I miss and love everyone! I will write to you next week and I can't wait to hear from you soon!

Love Sister Hawkins!